Valentine’s Day can feel especially heavy for women experiencing abuse or healing from painful relationships. If that is where you find yourself, please hear this: you are seen, deeply loved by your Creator, and not alone.
Below, please find a reflection from one of our support group leaders, Laurie, who shares her story and reminds us of this very truth.
If any part resonates with you, we invite you to explore our website, read more of our blogs, and learn about the services we offer. And when you feel ready, you can click here to reach out.
💜 A Reflection from Laurie
As Valentine’s Day draws near, it makes me think about how many years I searched for someone to make me feel loved, safe, and secure. I grew up in a home where I felt abandoned and alone and did not feel love from my parents. I spent most of my adult life searching for someone to love me. No matter how hard I tried, I always felt love eluded me and that I was not lovable.
When I got help after an abusive marriage, my therapist told me that my mother was not capable of giving me the love I was looking for from her, and I needed to learn how to love myself. I did not know where to start loving myself. A friend of mine told me to learn to love myself the way God loved me. I did not know how to do that. I grew up going to church, but love for me came with conditions and resulted in pain and suffering. The truth is, I felt abandoned by God, my parents, and the men I had been in relationships with.
There came point when I decided to try to dig deeper into God’s love and learn how to love myself the way He loved me. It was not an easy journey, but as I was praying one morning to be set free from another abusive relationship I was in, I felt a heaviness lift and an indescribable light fill me. For the first time, I started to feel God’s unconditional love for me and began trying to love myself and give myself grace.
“For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.” (Ephesians 2:10).
“See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!” (1 John 3:1).
I have since realized just how much God loves me and that I am a precious child of His. He loved me so much He gave His only Son for my sins! “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” (John 3:16).
So, on this Valentine’s Day, remember “We love because he first loved us” (1 John 4:19) and “The Lord your God is with you… He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.” (Zephaniah 3:17). When we truly grasp how much God loves us, it becomes easier to show kindness, patience, and grace to ourselves. So make sure to take some time this week to do a self-care activity to love yourself. God is our ultimate healer and will walk alongside you always.